Monday, August 9, 2010

Your comments, please.

Yes, ladies & gentlemen. It's been four years since I first introduced myself to bloggers at Livejournal, which was incidentally my first attempt at blogging. But 4 blogs and 218 posts later, little seems to have changed. The number of comments over the years has at best experienced a very modest, toned-down version of the 'Hindu Rate of Growth'. Maybe it's a good time for a review.

Initially, I was very kicked about maintaining a blog. I would look forward to writing a new post. I'd collect all my thoughts, revise all my puns, note down all pop-art or newsworthy references, all this while the BSNL dial-up struggled for ignition. After the blog was updated, there would be a joblist to be completed, which would encompass a 360-degree marketing activity. Casually mention the blog. Check. Rave about your latest post. Check. Refer to the 'one' funny comment on your blog. Check. Upload link on your Gtalk status. Check. Post link on an Orkut community. Check. Send link as a forward to dad. Check. This process went on for six months. Then on one fateful day, I stopped caring about my blog. And then I've always looked back ever since.

Now when I think about it, I realise why this blog has never been so comment-friendly. A guy who is in denial about his age, who is completely incapable of political opinion, who's not graduated from the musical collection of his college days, who's read Harry Potter a decade after it was a rage, who still laughs at his occasional pun, and whose Facebook Status draws more comments than his blog obviously doesn't have enough going on in his life to talk about. That pretty much puts this case to rest.

Now for the way forward. May be an insight or two from the 'Target Group' will give me an idea - a cliched line from the advertising industry that refuses to go out of vogue. From my recollection, blogs that boast of millions of comments belong to:

A) Celebrities
B) Women
C) Both of the above (Damn, this reminds me of my engineering entrance exam. When in doubt, mark C)

Now things are starting to get clearer. 17 days of determined contemplation, and my path becomes crystal-clear to me. I should assume a feminine non de plume. And stay anonymous. That's it. That way, I could be mistaken for any one of the above categories. I can safely write about some seriously earth-shattering topics like what I had for breakfast, what I had for a drink and where, and how I hate toddlers in aeroplanes, and how I hate cats and dogs, and how I hate nosey male bloggers who have absolutely nothing to offer to this world but for their comments on my blog. Oh boy, I cannot wait to read the comments that will flow from then on. Score!


Anonymous said...

Noncontroversial topics rarely get comments unless they are created by persons belonging to the three categories you mentioned.

Ani... said...

Good idea.. you could add your real blog into the "Blogs i read" of your feminine blog and leave occasional meaningless comments to yourself.

This could also drive the traffic to your real blog. :D

Also, that's a great way to explore your feminine side. lol

Sudhir Pai said...

@anonymous: Yep!! It took me a while to figure that out. :)

@Kidambi: hummm, never thought about it that way. lol!

Pallavi said...

You have rocking blog!!

the only reason that cud explain why not so many comment- well, not everyone knows how to understand and appreciate good stuff,else Chetan Bhagat wudn't b so popular!

Sudhir Pai said...

@Pallavi: If I even get one comment like yours, I'd gladly forget about the rest that dont come. ;)

Thank You!

Aractus said...

nice timing i have, eh ? commenting on your post now ! the 3rd paragraph is what makes Pai'sm worthwile to read !

btw, loved Pallavi's dig at Chetan Bhagat and couldnt agree more.

Victor Guerra said...

Sudhir, nice write up there!
I can't agree more with your feminine pseudo idea;-)
On a serious note, looking at the way you write, I would certainly suggest you to contribute to newspapers or other online sites where contributions are welcome.

Keep blogging.

Sudhir Pai said...

@aractus: How did I miss your comment? Thank you.:)

Sudhir Pai said...

@Victor: Thanks a ton, buddy. Very encouraging words. :)

akks said...

I couldn't agree more with your post, more so cause I've been through this! Now, I occasionally share what I write... like you once said mediocre writing is read more than interesting writing. And I guess that is why, a few people are different! Also, I totally agree with Pallavi :)