Saturday, November 29, 2008

Stairway to Heaven

There's a lady who's sure
All that glitters is gold
And she's buying a stairway to heaven.

Sometime in October, Swati and I were discussing our favourite rock songs. And the whole discussion started because she had the lyrics of "Stairway to Heaven" on her Gtalk Status Message. That reminded me of the only time I'd tried Karaoke at a fest in IIMB, when I attempted to dazzle an audience with this number with a hope that the place wouldn't echo with laughter instead of applause(more about my performance later). So what is it about "Stairway" that people, who were born more than a decade after the the song released, quote as twenty-something-year olds?

And it makes me wonder

Is it the mystical nature of the lyrics? Mysterious figures and images of nature abound: a lady, the piper, the May queen, a brook, a songbird, rings of smoke through the trees, a hedgerow, the wind. And with some evocative messages that implore listeners to pay attention to the lyrics.

There's a sign on the wall
But she wants to be sure
'cause you know sometimes words have two meanings.
In a tree by the brook
There's a songbird who sings,
Sometimes all of our thoughts are misgiven.

Is it the haunting melody sung in an enticing tone that draws us to it like the mice and children that followed Pied Piper all the way in Hamlin? Do they really promise to lead us to a new dawn

And its whispered that soon
If we all call the tune
Then the piper will lead us to reason.
And a new day will dawn
For those who stand long
And the forests will echo with laughter.

There are probably several other reasons. What I love about the song is that it starts with the gentle strains of an Acoustic guitar with accompaniments that are very reminiscent of the simple folk of the shire in the LOTR trilogy. But then there is a sudden transition from the acoustic to the electric, probably symbolizing the evolution to the Industrial age, with a raucous roar of heavy distortion. It then ends in the poignant tone that it began with. All this render the song into the best musical representation of a gratifying orgasm, complete with an eight-minute foreplay leading up to it.

There'll be several Led Zeppelectics who'll probably tear this review apart, but where they'll surely agree with me is when I say "Stairway", along with at least a couple of other numbers like "Whole Lotta Love" and "Immigrant Song" have elevated Led Zeppelin to a sacrosanct place in Rock and Roll History and that they've made a lasting impression in the music history's proverbial sands of time.

And if you listen very hard
The tune will come to you at last.
When all are one and one is all
To be a rock and not to roll.

And shes buying a stairway to heaven.

Thursday, November 27, 2008

I accept your nomination for presidency of the United States

Thank you! Oh! Thank you! I can hardly conjugate verbs!

Thank you, everybody.I feel so surgically enhanced! This is so orgiastic!

Thank you once more. To all my fellow citizens of this great nation, with profound gratitude and great humility, I accept your nomination for presidency of the United States.And this presidency - it's so suspiciously phallic! Oh, thank you again!

I just want everyone to read in the tabloids that even in my wildest fits of self-loathing, I never would have fantasized that this could ever validate my mediocrity. And to the other suck-ass nominees, I want each of you to know how totally mega-pumped your lackluster applause makes me feel right now! Thank you once more!

You know when they first told me I wasn't Blonde or Texan enough, I just had to take a craft seminar and scoff about how unaesthetic my experiences have been. I guess it all just makes me feel kinda special!

You know, there are so many ass-kissing two-faced harpies to thank! First off though, I want to bitch-slap the senile old bats of the Congress, who looked deep within their cold, black hearts before giving me this fantastic opportunity of kicking some ass! Also, I want to thank Charleton Heston, for being such a powerful force in all my negotiations leading up to the presidency. And to the People Under the Stairs, who taught me to take life by the fifth of bourbon. And finally, to all the sycophantic talk show hosts - I couldn't have done it without you!

Thank you America, and good night!

PS: I'd also like to thank this acceptance speech generator. So long till the next presidential campaign!

Monday, November 24, 2008

Wednesday, November 19, 2008

I Got Tagged!

Kida tagged me the other day, and it's only the second time I've got tagged. Jayshree tagged me once and I didn't know how it worked then. So here goes.

The tag:

Two questions in each category answer them and then tag your friends from the blog-o-sphere. Leave a comment on their blog letting them know they have been tagged and you are all set.


Your oldest memories

1. Falling of the bed while trying to pull off a stunt with the tricycle on the bed
( if you wondering how I've turned out like this, i fell on my head!)

2. Naming my kid sister even before she was born.

3. Driving around the world in my little blue Ferrari and dad's Atlas.

4. Playing at the Matunga Gymkhana with two of my cousins, pinky and jyo.

5. Winning a story telling competition at SIES Kindergarten.

6. Moving to Chembur, Mumbai.

7. Singing "Part-time Lover" and "Papa Don't Preach" which was played in our school bus at Fatima High School. Without understanding the lyrics, of course!

8. A Trip to the Andamans.

9. Moving to Hyderabad.

10. Losing my way after I failed to find a zebra crossing in Hyderabad.

11. My first kiss ( as an 7 year old, that ought to be special ;))

12. Playing battleships at the under-construction swimming pool at Divya Shakti Apartments.

13. Building a Robot using Lego bricks along with Ramanan and Parikshit, after being highly inspired by Force Five.

14. Winning my first quiz with Ramanan.

15. Being gifted MJ's "Dangerous" after standing 3rd in class.

16. Watching Jurassic Park at Sangeet.

17. Singing Christmas Carols for His Excellency Krishna Kanth, the Governor of AP at Raj Bhavan .

18. Being gifted a red rose by my crush for valentines day.

19. My visits to Thallasery, Kerala.

19. Refusing to learn singing because only girls went for singing classes.

20. Playing a game of Basketball against YMCA and nearly getting murdered.

21. Whacking the ball out of the ground in a game against United Avenue.

22. Being gifted a fountain pen by my Math teacher for scoring a 100% in an exam.

23. Buying my first pair of Nike.

What were you doing ten years ago?

November 1998, the start of a few very forgettable years,...errr! I cant seem to remember!


Your first thought in the morning:

Damnit!! What was my dream again??

If you build a time capsule what would it contain?

A sign which reads "All those of you who enter here, abandon all hope!"

Will Be:

This year…

I intend to pursue all my passions pro-actively. Those include lying on my bed and staring at the ceiling, and sitting at my cubicle and staring at the glass panel in front of me. I'm still optimistic about shedding 5 kilos off my body before the year ends, because the label of obesity is too heavy for my shoulders. I'm finally going to enter the Guinness book of world records for the number of times I utter "basically" and "chill! chill!" in a conversation.

What do you see yourself doing 14 years from now?

I'll still be in Advertising. I'll still be working on my first book, my first play, my first film, my first graphic novel and the likes. Basically, I'll still be 21. After all, some things will never change. For everything else, there is Mastercard.

I tag:

Precocious Perf ( the one who introduced me to blogging )


Sam,The Goddess ( My first blog-friend )

Jayashree ( The first blogger to tag me )

Alokish & Alole ( two people who have been, in recent months, subjected to both, my blog and I. And also all the typo's ( oops! i meant typos) in my blog. )

Sunday, November 2, 2008

Words: The long and the short of it...

The other day, when I was talking of a friend, I spoke of her thus, "There is much concealed behind that cheerful face. Her amicable demeanour betrays many a tragedy".
That left me wondering. Did I really have to use such long words to articulate my thoughts? Imagine if we had nursery rhymes like,
" Scintillate, scintillate globule vivific, Fain would I fathom thy nature specific."
Such circumstances would, as the cliche goes, create catastrophes of colossal proportions.

So, boys and girls, I have made up my mind. When I speak or write, you will not find any long words. I will use the good old short words - like the sun, the moon, the stars and the likes.

short words will start to chime
and this will bring forth some rhyme

Aye Aye, Sir! Short sweet words that please the eye and the ear and the tongue and the heart and the mind and the soul.

Why use long words when short words can shed light on big things with grace and charm. Use long words when you think they do you no harm.

And if you read this piece aloud, you will know that the tongue likes bright, sharp, quick terse, swift, brisk short words.

So love them or hate them, but short words are fine!

(PS: the last six paragraphs emerged as a result of a deliberate attempt at writing something with only single syllable words.)